In Moderation

Milestone Celebrations and Positivity with Adam Wright

Rob Lapham, Liam Layton Season 1 Episode 50

Ever wondered what it would be like to celebrate a podcast milestone with your closest friends and an unexpected twist? Well, join us as we mark our 50th episode and one-year anniversary with our favorite guest, Adam! We take a trip down memory lane, sharing uproarious stories of our dogs' escapades and recalling the pivotal moments that have defined our podcast journey. Adam, infamous for his in-game betrayals, gives us a peek into his secret double life as a cosplayer, and we even ponder the bizarre charm of owning exotic pets.

But it's not all fun and games. We dive into a thought-provoking discussion on body image and societal expectations. Inspired by a viral incident, we unpack the harsh realities of how negative comments can stem from personal insecurities and societal pressures. With heartfelt personal anecdotes, we emphasize the importance of empathy and understanding in our daily interactions. Our conversation transitions smoothly into the vital topic of embracing body positivity and balance, shedding light on the dangers of diet culture and the true meaning of health and wellness.

To wrap things up, we explore the art of balancing kindness and accountability in personal growth. We share practical advice on setting realistic goals and avoiding the pitfalls of popular diets and fitness apps. With Adam back in the hot seat, we tackle rapid-fire fitness questions, debating everything from exercise routines to the best non-meat protein options. And for a bit of fun, we end with a spirited debate on food textures, leaving you with laughter and a teaser for future episodes. Join us in celebrating the milestones, the growth, and the camaraderie that have shaped our journey so far!

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Speaker 1:

I gave him like two trazodone just to try and calm him down.

Speaker 2:

I can't be the only one that suddenly had in my head gotta keep that dog sedated, Nice.

Speaker 1:

That's not how that song goes, though, right.

Speaker 2:

Gotta keep them separated.

Speaker 1:

Keep them separated. Yeah, I remember that, that's a song, that's a song.

Speaker 2:

It's definitely a song. Yes, what do you all want to talk about today?

Speaker 1:

Oh man, I got nothing. What do you guys feel? Like Anything?

Speaker 2:

Welcome to episode 50 of In Moderation, where we're still trying to figure out what we're going to talk about.

Speaker 1:

We're just going to chat. We're just going to chat, is it?

Speaker 2:

episode 50? Awesome man.

Speaker 1:

It's episode 50.

Speaker 2:

And it's also like our one year anniversary too.

Speaker 1:

Hey, we've been doing this for a year. Man, that's like we started. Did we actually start this when Oakley was like born?

Speaker 2:

That's crazy, right before she was born.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, great time with you. That's right. I don't remember things. We were just talking about how my dog is just probably tore his ACL, not the other dog that tore both her ACLs. That's a different ACL tearage. So yeah, everything's going just awesome.

Speaker 2:

Amazeballs, all your dogs are tearing all the ACLs, so good.

Speaker 1:

Anyway, Adam, how you doing.

Speaker 3:

I'm fantastic. I'm fantastic, I'm happy to be here. Guys, thanks for having me.

Speaker 2:

We brought Adam back because he is the record holder for having the most listens in the first seven days per mil. Let's go Record holder. You know his episode came out quite a while ago when we had a smaller audience, but it still kind of was like whoa yes, hello episode.

Speaker 3:

Welcome everybody happy to be here if you're, if you're new to the podcast.

Speaker 1:

I'm adam new to the number six fitness podcast on apple take that look at this is.

Speaker 3:

This is incredible. I'm proud of you guys for doing this only in, in, in a year, and you've already climbed the ladder because we cool like that, we cool like that, we cool, we cool.

Speaker 2:

You're hanging with the cool kids now popular and cool are similar enough that I think we can.

Speaker 1:

You're hanging with the cool kids now. Popular and cool are similar enough that I think we can label it that.

Speaker 3:

And you know, I will say you know just as three humans. The first time I was on the show we really hadn't interacted a ton, and now I feel like we have gotten to know each other quite a bit better.

Speaker 1:

So this is going to be even more natural and fun Thanks to the power of video games.

Speaker 3:

Really, what can't they? Do Bringing the community together, you know.

Speaker 2:

Exactly, and letting Adam stab me in the back several times.

Speaker 1:

It was a good start to yeah our video game campaigns when just adam immediately tried to kill all of us that was that was that was amazing I, I am not a huge gamer.

Speaker 3:

I mean, I'm starting to be now, but at the time this is all very new to me and I like that.

Speaker 3:

You're not a huge gamer but you do cosplay and you like your dress up as everything I I know, uh, I'm a big nerd, just not like a video game nerd, um, and that's really interesting because a lot of people don't know that about me. That's kind of like a secret life that that a lot of people don't know, uh, but it's, you know, they're starting to, they're starting to come and find me, they're starting to see my secret life involves a lot more monkeys, really.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, a lot of them different types to you know like like pet monkeys.

Speaker 3:

What? Are you not telling us?

Speaker 1:

That's why it's called a secret. You know, this kind of ruins the whole thing His secret's not out yet.

Speaker 3:

Rob, what's your secret? Do you have primates in your house?

Speaker 2:

Only me and a cat of course, a singular primate.

Speaker 3:

I think that's a good icebreaker.

Speaker 1:

Hey, how are you doing and do you have primates in your house? Start off with that.

Speaker 3:

I like that. I think someone becomes instantly more interesting if they own an exotic pet.

Speaker 2:

Whether that's a monkey or a snake. Instantly more interesting or instantly more illegal person taking stealing eggs from things in the middle of the jungle.

Speaker 3:

Listen, if I, if my neighbor was Hagrid or something, and he had, like you know, some exotic dragon eggs, I'm not, I'm not narking, I just want to come over and see it.

Speaker 1:

Who would nark on dragon eggs Right? As fun as it is to talk about mystical exotic animals for another hour, which I mean, who wouldn't love that?

Speaker 1:

We just renamed the podcast, which we should probably get on other top. You know what's been kind of on my mind, just cause, like I just kind of did a video on it. Um, I had tagged in this video a bunch. There was a guy. He kind of started off with a video saying it's like women suck. I was at a bar and I was just kind of minding my own business and I waved at these like pretty girls at the table, you know, smiled and walked away and he said as I walked away I heard him say I heard them say he should be on my 600 pound life and yeah, yeah, I know, and there's it's, it's been a whole thing.

Speaker 1:

He has made multiple follow-up videos. Like if you watch my content on tiktok and all that stuff, you'll, you'll probably see it. I just made a video on it. But like I just want to say you it's, I want to get your take on this because I feel like it's insults are already kind of tough to deal with, like you know, like you know you only insults only hurt you if you let them, but it can be kind of tough in general. I feel like it's worse, though, when you open up with like positivity and then you get an insult back like you try and start off a car, you know, start off an interaction, I guess we'll say with some form of positivity, even if it's just like a wave and a smile, and then they come back with like hey, you suck, like you know it. Doesn't that feel worse?

Speaker 3:

yeah, that's pretty, that's pretty awful. I I don't. I don't know what it is about people. I feel like some people are just you know, is it a cope? Is it a? Is it a way to deal with their own sadness? Or I don't know why people feel the need to constantly talk about people's bodies and that could be themselves too, you know their own bodies but definitely about people's bodies and sizes, sizes and like it's just. It is so incredibly sad because it rarely, if ever, does anything productive. I don't know what the point is that you think is going to. What do you think is going to come out of that exchange? Me telling someone or even my friends are making fun of somebody that you know like a comment like that you should be on my 600 pound life, like why, why would you say something like that?

Speaker 1:

I genuinely do not understand what they get out of that. What's the point of it? Yeah, I see what you're saying, but like it's definitely coming from them, I'm sure they're not thinking, oh, like, what productive thing could I say right now? It's more of just something in the short term that makes them laugh, like, hey, let me make my friends laugh at the expense of someone else, even if it is hurtful, and they just don't care. Now, does that come from a place where, because they're dealing with their own issues, they project that on others? It seems very plausible, but you know, like I've always been interested in the idea like what they say, like hurt people, hurt people, like people who are are hurt, hurt others, which it does kind of feel that way. But like, when I've listened to people who are more experts on the topic, it's just like it might not be so much the case and it might be people are just dicks. Like there might be certain people that are just assholes.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, an asshole an asshole.

Speaker 1:

You kind of just have to deal with them you know, I definitely think it's well.

Speaker 3:

Let me give you an example. I was this is not someone who is purposely being a dick but I was talking to a client this morning and she was telling me that she went and saw her parents and her mom is pretty overweight and has diabetes and whatnot. And she was telling me that her mom, no matter what, like she's like 75. Her mom, no matter what, like she's like 75 and always has something to say about other people's bodies or other people's weight, or my client's weight, and it just doesn't matter like what it is. She always has something to say. And I told her today.

Speaker 3:

I think that and this is certainly not the case for everybody, but for people who especially tend to be mothers, you know, people who grew up in the 70s, 80s, they and have been surrounded with diet culture their whole damn life it really is hard to not think about that Like. That is something that clearly this lady has talked about or thought about her entire life, every single day being overweight, getting thinner, losing weight you know what I'm, what she's eating, what she's not eating, what she can't eat, all those things right, every day, every, every thought is all consuming, and so it's the most important thing to her in her life, and so I think she just cannot help but to uh, you know, put that sort of thinking on other people and and she automatically assumes that it's the most important thing in people and other people's life as well.

Speaker 1:

So I'm going to bring up a reference that is gonna make perfect sense here fight club. You guys know the movie right, so in in the movie fight club, I think at the beginning spoiler alert.

Speaker 2:

Spoiler like who's the protagonist? I don't remember, 20 years later he's in yeah fight club.

Speaker 3:

I was like no way.

Speaker 2:

I haven't spent my list for so long.

Speaker 1:

I'm not even giving any spoilers away, so whatever. But like at the beginning of the movie, he's he's in Fight Club but he's going to his job at the time and he's like on the bus looking around and he's just constantly thinking about who he could fight and who he could beat and who he'd have trouble with and like all these things. And I think so when it comes to like you know what you were saying. And I think so when it comes to like you know what you were saying, it can be true of just anything. When you get kind of consumed by something, whether it's a sport or losing weight or fight club or whatever it is, that's just kind of all you think about. It's what you want to talk about. And for someone who's had difficulty losing weight and maybe they've done it, but it's been- you know, again, extremely difficult for them.

Speaker 1:

That's really all they can think about and talk about, and so they project it on into or talk about it to other people.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, especially in that there's that age range, that before body positivity thing became a thing, and you, they grew up with people like Twiggy as the, the person you were supposed to model yourself after.

Speaker 3:

Hmm, twiggy, that's a. That's a. Twiggy, that's an old. You don't know who that is.

Speaker 1:

That's an old reference Clueless, clueless on this topic.

Speaker 2:

She was a supermodel, super thin.

Speaker 1:

Liam's a oh so like a A young man. Kate Moss, that's a supermodel that was thin. That's what I know.

Speaker 2:

Yep, there you are.

Speaker 1:

She was. Before Kate Moss Liam's a young man, she's before. Oh well then, jesus Christ, I barely know Kate Moss.

Speaker 2:

That's like come on now, Work with me.

Speaker 3:

a little bit here before Kate Moss but yeah, I mean, I mean, yeah, any, any, any supermodel or just anybody in that time, movies, movie stars, but uh, but it's not really that different now. I mean, you know, I mean there are definitely celebrities in bigger bodies, but you know, diet culture still promotes that constant need to be dinner. And it doesn't.

Speaker 1:

I don't know what it is, it's just it is a fascination, but at the same time it's so weird to me, because Adele lost a bunch of weight and she fucking got just so slammed by that. So it doesn't. It just seems like it doesn't matter what you do, like if you're a bigger person, like, oh, and then you know people get mad, and then you lose weight and people are mad at that and it just doesn't matter what you do, people just get mad.

Speaker 3:

And that's this fascination with people's bodies. Like that is why it's just. I think it is just so entirely inappropriate to make comments on what people look like. Who cares? What does it matter to you? I, you know, listen. I like, when I bring on clients, when I, when I work with clients, I tell them, listen, like I am not going to tell you what to do with your body.

Speaker 3:

I work with a lot of clients who want to lose weight, but I don't assume that everyone that comes to me wants to, wants to lose weight. If, but I don't assume that everyone that comes to me wants to lose weight. If you tell me that's what you want to do, I will support you as long as it's done in a healthy way, and teach you ways to do that. But, like, if you you don't, you can go to the gym, you can start eating right and you don't have to have a goal of weight loss. And I feel like so many people think that that is the default and that everybody needs to look like Barbie and Ken and that if you don't, uh, you're doing it wrong. Uh, and it's just so frustrating. Everybody has this obsession with you, know, like a society of, of, of of thin people, why, who cares? That's going to be so boring. I feel like a society is so much more interesting with people, with you know, a diverse people.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I mean, and I think even just starting off without weight loss in mind at first can be very helpful, because then that's just another thing that you can't, you're not going to get discouraged by Absolutely Because that happens to someone. We talked about, I think, that last time about how the scale you get discouraged by that. So I won't go far into that. But like, oh, you know what I saw recently? Um, have you guys seen the infinity hoop, infinity loop something like that it's like a hula hoop.

Speaker 1:

It's like a hula hoop. Yeah, yeah, it's like a hula hoop. You, you wrap it around your your belly, and then you got this little ball on a string and you kind of go, you know, move back and forth and you keep it around you like a hula hoop.

Speaker 2:

Oh, one of those things Is this making a comeback. That used to be a toy in the 90s.

Speaker 3:

Okay, Well no, I don't Anyway this was very popular, like two years ago on TikTok. Maybe it's making a comeback.

Speaker 1:

Okay, it's coming back around now. I think one creator has been really doing it and people have been hating her for it because, again, they hate everyone for everything. It's the internet, welcome. But what I like about it is it's got these little links. It's got these little links. It's connected by links, so like as you get, if you, if you lose weight, you remove a link and then you just you attach it back together. So that's a way where, like, you're not going to get discouraged by the skill you take. You know, like I'm not looking at numbers because you know that goes up and down, but a link like that's, that's a, a tangible thing in your hand. You just take it off, you connect it and like I think, just kind of overall, just looking how, just seeing how you look, or you know measurements or whatever like that can be.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, also similar to a belt size, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, but it's fun while you do it. I completely agree. I think that you know I tell people often like let's. Well, I get the most excited when they tell me this. They come to me and they say, hey, listen. Like like, yeah, I do want to lose some weight, but like that's not my primary goal. My primary goal is I want to play with my kid longer. I want to be able to have a better quality of life. I want to do all these things. I want life to be more enjoyable, um, on a day-to-day basis, and if I lose weight in the process, cool. I'm like hell, yes, that's exactly what I want. I want like let's make that maybe a secondary or a tertiary goal, not the primary one, because your primary goal is weight loss.

Speaker 3:

you know, you could just get discouraged so easily Very easily Because, yeah, no matter, because sometimes, and this is the God's honest truth that people don't understand you can work your ass off and really do seemingly everything right and your body will not respond.

Speaker 1:

And that's the unfortunate truth, and I you know, and it's the most frustrating thing, but I, I I saw a study showing that, like for every I think it was, I don't call me the exact number, so this was a while ago. I looked at it. But, like, for every kilogram you lose, your, your appetite goes up by a certain amount. It was like I don't know like a hundred calories or something like that. So, like, you get hungrier as you lose body fat and also you know your metabolism will slow by a very small amount. So, like, which makes sense, if you're less mass, you're just going to require less energy. You know that just makes sense.

Speaker 1:

But so it wasn't by much. But, like, you know, you get enough of that. That just makes it so much harder and your body's fighting back the whole time. So, like, I don't like to talk about that too much because I don't want to discourage people and tell them like well, it's worth, it's not worth it, like, don't even try. I think definitely. You know, if it's something you want, you should try it. But it's just to understand it can be very difficult. And then for other people like myself, I it's difficult for me to gain weight and there's everyone in between.

Speaker 3:

So yeah, and and the reality is like, and for every you know, uh, tde calculator online, like all those things. These are all estimates and your body may be, whether it's because of metabolic conditions or, I mean, fucking anything else you don't know what's going on. You know, and you may not have access to a doctor and be able to get blood labs, and you may not. You know, you and the doctor may you may have underlying issues that they can't find.

Speaker 1:

You might have a shitty doctor that says just go on keto, try, try 800 calories.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, you tried eating less. Thanks, doc I appreciate it.

Speaker 1:

I never thought about that before. Now I'm healthy.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, seriously, it's just. You know it's so, it's so difficult and I'll be honest, yeah, and it's something that I struggle with too. You know I've been really overweight in my life, early in my adulthood and you know, even now, as I'm like a busy adult with a full-time job Busy cosplayer.

Speaker 3:

Cosplaying all over the place. You know, if I want to trim down a couple of, a couple of pounds, like it's freaking hard, man, like there is. It is difficult to maintain a calorie deficit for a long period of time because you have adult things like dinners with family members and dates and and children and uh, you know it's not an easy thing to do and I feel like people are so hard on themselves and they go their whole life being unhappy because they can't do a thing or I don't want to say they can't, but they haven't done a thing and they put all their eggs in this basket. If I could just lose weight, I'd be happy, and it is freaking hard for so many reasons and I just is my greatest hope that people who struggle so much with weight loss learn to appreciate the body that they are in, even if it's not where they want to be. You know, like your happiness. I strongly believe that.

Speaker 3:

So there's two, there's two places, there's two extremes here. There's one where it's like you are perfectly happy and you don't need and you don't want to change your body and you can just accept how you are and be real. You know, life is great. That's really not a place a lot of people are at. And then there's the other one where you are just completely miserable and you will only be happy if you achieve the body of your dreams. But you try and you just can't.

Speaker 3:

I very strongly wish we could find that middle ground where you can want to make some changes to your body but you could also change your mindset. I think there has to be a medium. There has to be some sort of a middle ground where you can want to make some changes but also compromise a little bit and say you know what, as I'm making changes, I can also be happy, and that's okay. It's okay to appreciate my body, even if it's not where I want to be completely, and life is going to be a hell of a lot more enjoyable when you can find that middle ground. It's not an easy place to be, but, by God, if you didn't let that feeling or let those insecurities get to you every day, how much better would your life be.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I definitely think using some of that, those feelings for kind of I don't know motivation or something like it's always nice to have, like I want to do better, I want to feel better, but like exactly how much that's difficult. That's why you want to have a moderate and in moderation amount of that boom.

Speaker 2:

He said it he said the thing there we go, there we go, this, this, um is something like that adam's been actually yelling about me at at me, not about me at me lately, is self-value, whether that's, in my case, valuing my time and stuff, but also valuing who you are as a person, valuing your body, all all these things.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and it can go to really so many people, Cause that's I see, like I also get like tagged in a lot of stuff on the other side of kind of like the spectrum, where there's like young males wanting to get, you know, gained a lot of muscle, and they just kind of have this body dysmorphia where they're like I just feel small and I just want to get bigger, you know, like. So it can really happen to anyone on any spectrum.

Speaker 2:

It's really.

Speaker 1:

It's not just that you just you don't feel comfortable in who you, you don't like who you are and so okay. So this kind of goes back to I want to ask you I did a little video you brought, I don't know if you saw, a little while ago. There was like a woman that was like getting ready for the gym and I thought it was very interesting. She was like I'm going to the gym not because I want to, but because I don't want to be fat. You know, like I want to go because I want to be able to fit into my jeans and I want to be able to blah, blah, blah. You know, do all these things and sometimes it's OK to be mean to yourself. Sometimes, I think, is what she said.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

And my dog who tore his ACL, is just barking at nothing. I'm sure that's cool and so like, where, like, and I thought it was. I just kind of opened up the conversation for people and it is really interesting because I think a lot of people kind of start there but you know that's kind of tough to sustain for the rest of your life. You're just going to be mean to yourself. I don't know if that sounds great. So how do you feel about? Do you think you can use that at the beginning to usher in better habits, better thoughts? Good question.

Speaker 3:

So I I have made a few of these videos because I and I think I saw your video and that and I was like, oh, I gotta respond to that. And then I feel like the last 10 freaking videos I've made have all been the same, because it's all like I don't know what it is. I see so many videos now about people who are like it it's okay to hate yourself, it'll help, and I'm like, okay, all right, I'll, I'll let me. Let me tell you about my, my journey.

Speaker 3:

Just just a very brief Um so, I started when he was three, when my mom met my dad Twinkie, I, okay, I spent 25 years of my life being overweight, um, and and, and I was told my whole life that I had to uh that that my body was not, uh, desirable. You know, I was overweight most of my life and I spent a lot of that time hating myself, um, and one of the things that I tell clients and I put in my videos a lot is is I believe that you can't be your your own bully and also your best friend. I've been bullied. It did not once make me happier. It didn't put me in a smaller body. I've been made fun of because I was fat. I've been called names and it never made me thin. All it did was make me unhappy.

Speaker 3:

I don't think the solution to changing your body is being your own bully. I don't think that there's anything being mean to yourself can provide you that being kind to yourself can't. I just think in every case and some people are going to disagree with me, but I think in every case kindness is a better option. And that doesn't mean you can't be honest with yourself and it doesn't mean you can't keep yourself accountable. You can do both of those things while being a little bit more forgiving a little less critical of yourself. I think you can go. Hey, myself, you know, um, you did not meet the mark today. You didn't eat the way you probably should have. You know you didn't follow the plan that you put in place. You didn't keep the promises you made to yourself.

Speaker 2:

But that's okay, you can start again tomorrow or you can start again the difference between constructive criticism and telling somebody or telling yourself that you belong on 600 pound life, exactly, exactly, and I think that would be the devil's advocate for that.

Speaker 1:

In that argument scenario, people would say, oh, you're just telling people that their bad habits are okay, right, because they would just say, oh, so it doesn't matter. Then tell yourself, oh, you ate this, you didn't do that and it's fine, whatever. And I think the key is, like you said it's, you can still use it to motivate you. You can still say, hey, it didn't, I didn't do what I wanted to. I'm going to, I'm going to try again. I'm not going to just say it's fine, I'll keep you know, doing whatever, but I am going to try.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, the key is being honest with yourself.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, and I think you're exactly right. People think being kind to yourself means letting yourself off the hook all the time. That's not what it means.

Speaker 2:

You can be real and be kind. Is it really kind to yourself if you're letting yourself off the hook?

Speaker 3:

I mean, yeah, I mean depends, I think depends on what it is, but I just think I've never, personally and professionally with clients as well, I I always see a better rate of success when we allow what I call a for the most part mindset, because I will tell you, um a lot of clients who go zero to a hundred, all or nothing, you know, they're all in, and then they fuck up and they're all out. Sorry about the swearing.

Speaker 1:

Sorry, this podcast.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I was fucking right. It's not like Julian doesn't swear every five seconds.

Speaker 3:

But I know that you know, people are very, very harsh on themselves and they're like damn, I really I did something and then I screwed it up. I was doing so good and I screwed up and now it's all up and now it's all for nothing. And there is something I really try and implement with my clients and it's the for the most part mindset. I don't tell my clients I want you to hit the gym every day. I want you to eat perfect every day, meal prep seven days a week. Listen, it's okay to set goals. Okay, you want to hit the gym four days a week this week, great. But I want your goal to be I'm going to try and hit the gym four times this week for the most part, or let's say, four times a week this month for the most part, immediately. That for the most part sentence allows for a little bit of flexibility and it allows you to still hit your goal if you only go three times a week, you know, and it takes the pressure off, it allows you to go.

Speaker 3:

Okay. You know what? I still went to the gym many times. I still did what I aimed to do, even if it wasn't the four times a week. I did it for the most part, and that sort of flexibility really can change how successful you are or aren't. Because let's say you don't go four times a week and you're like I'm going to go four times a week. Let's say work got busy, you didn't go. Well, now you feel like you really screwed up. I only went twice this week. Great, you went twice this week. That's awesome. That's better than zero, it's better than one, you know so.

Speaker 3:

You're not being your worst.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, you know so you're not being your worst?

Speaker 1:

Yeah right, that is such a tough question. How do you be kind to yourself but also realistic and sort of stern, I guess? Maybe I do, you know, I don't know what the exact word is, but and I guess having flexibility, I like that, I think that would help. I think it kind of just depends on the person and you kind of have to figure out what works so that you don't go off Fuck it, because the off Fuck it, I think, is what that's. What does people in. Something happens and they just go out. Well, that's it.

Speaker 3:

And I think this kind of goes back Remember when we were talking to the I think we brought this up before the Ziegler's.

Speaker 1:

Ziegler's yeah, he was like, oh, you got to go around the stick, zigglers. And he was just like, yeah, he was like, go, you got to go around the stick. Um, I think it kind of goes back to that where, like adam, he's basically saying, like a lot of people on the fitness journey they're walking along, there's a stick in the road and they go, oh shit, well, I don't know what to do. Now there's this fucking stick. There wasn't a stick before, might as well just turn back and so, whatever helps you, kind of go around that that stick and do something similar. Do something, you know, do something else. Just do something is always better than nothing. I say that a lot. Something's always better than nothing.

Speaker 3:

Absolutely, and I think so many people think especially. You know, when it comes to like a journey like this, they have to be perfect. They have to be perfect, and if they don't, they won't see the results they're looking for, which is just not the case.

Speaker 2:

And even if you're trying to be Mr Olympia.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, and here you know. Here's what the audience needs to remember. If you achieve perfection, congratulations. You're the first. You won't be. Don't put that kind of pressure on yourself. You don't expect other people to be perfect in anything, so why are you putting that kind of pressure on yourself?

Speaker 2:

If you achieve perfection, you're going to have a ton of trophies on your wall. Yeah, seriously.

Speaker 3:

I mean look at, but look at the best athletes in the world. Look at Simone Biles. Is she perfect every time?

Speaker 1:

No, she's not, but she is goddamn the greatest you know, but people expect perfection from themselves when they start something for sure.

Speaker 3:

Especially something brand they're brand new to. This is what I tell clients when they start to learn intuitive eating. I tell them listen, you essentially are a toddler learning to walk for the first time. This is not something you've probably ever tried before, or if you have, you know you're doing it again and you're going to struggle. You don't yell at a toddler who hasn't learned to walk right away. Hey, you stupid idiot. It's one foot in front of the other. Why aren't you driving Right exactly, get a car Right and guess what? You're not a bully to them either. Right, like you're kind to them and you encourage them. And when you are learning to do something that is new and if you're overweight, weight loss is something you are still learning to accomplish and these habits are something you're learning to implement it's far better to be kind to yourself and let yourself you know, have a little bit of slack, realize that it's okay. You know what I'm learning. Okay, it goes back to that spiral of healing. You know you're learning something new.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I was going to say we did talk to a little bit of that in a follow-up video, so I was going to ask you about that as well.

Speaker 3:

For sure, yeah, like expect yourself to fall back into past behaviors a little bit.

Speaker 1:

That's part of the process. Yeah, so to say, give the little spiral of healing thing first, just so like you know yeah, so what the hell actually hold on, let me pull up my whiteboard got it.

Speaker 3:

So if you go on the youtube, yeah, if you go on the youtube or something, you'll, you'll see it. But yeah, the spiral of healing is very much like an upward tornado. I have this from I think I don't know if it was a video, but it's a video Um. So, yeah, so it looks like an upward tornado and there's going to be times. There's gonna be times where you're healing and you're healing and everything's going really well, um, and then you kind of take a dip and your motivation goes down a little bit and then you're like man, my behaviors have gone back, I'm failing.

Speaker 3:

In reality, it's not a failure. That is a great time for you to step back and say, okay, you know what, I haven't been my best, but that's where we kind of keep ourselves accountable and it's where we're kind to ourselves, ideally. So we can say let me examine things and figure out what I can fix. And then we start to get back on the track to healing, change, improvement. It's not a linear line, like there's going to be times where we slip up and expect it multiple times, multiple times throughout your journey, because, uh, that is how we learn and that is how we learn, that is how we grow.

Speaker 1:

And if you expect perfection, that is one of the things I'm like just so, interested in is because, like the first, let's say the first, tornado spiral, so many people reach that first one and it's got ah, shit, well, didn't work. Yep, how do you get people to not do like it's just so? I just see that from so many people I really do and like I like I want to, like a scotty k fitness, yell at them in a positive way, like I want to just yell at you and just be like stop, why are you doing this to yourself? It's like you're punching yourself in the gut and then saying, why does it hurt?

Speaker 2:

like I just want you, I want what's best for you please, on a side note, we should should really make a Scotty soundboard. It's not that serious, Maybe yeah.

Speaker 1:

Can I get one of those and just like an app on the phone?

Speaker 2:

maybe that you can just like play those at certain parts.

Speaker 1:

Where we get like we get a bunch of people right, we get an app and then it just says those things. Like you hit a button and it just says those things because I'll make a video saying something to this extent. And people are like, man, I needed to hear this today. I'm like how do I get to you to hear that every day?

Speaker 3:

You need it, that's what.

Speaker 2:

I need to know, Like how do you?

Speaker 1:

ah, and I, just I, I haven't figured. No one's figured it out yet I don't know but like it's just one of those things that that kind of consumes me, like how do I do this?

Speaker 3:

how do I do this?

Speaker 1:

yeah, set set your favorite video as as your ringtone or something as your alarm clock I don't care if it's cheesy as fuck, like whatever you need, like you wake up, yes to your alarm clock, or something like that. Like I don't give a, I don't care. Whatever you gotta do well, because it's just yeah, it's.

Speaker 3:

It really is frustrating, but I will tell you this I think that the biggest thing that people need to remember is that their expectations. I think most people's failures happen because of improper expectations People set well people, especially with diets. Let's use that as an example. People think immediately okay, if I do this diet, it worked for this person, it worked for that person. I've heard all the good things, I will, I will definitely lose weight, and then they don't, or they do, and then they gain weight back. And then they don't or they do, and then they gain weight back. And then they are disappointed. And the reality is you probably have not failed these diets. What happens is these diets are set up for you to fail. That is how they work, especially things like weight watchers. Things like Weight Watchers, things like Keto juice cleanses there is a high rate of failure for those things because they are not there. You can't do them, they're not sustainable.

Speaker 2:

And so you'll see they are literally designed so that you lose the weight and then, a certain amount of time later, you will probably gain it back. And it's enough time that you don't think it's the fault of the diet right.

Speaker 1:

But also you just go back to it. You say it worked because, like, I lost weight during that time, so it worked, so I just need to go back and do it right again, and that's how they get their repeat customers. Why, I don't know. I'll just say it's going to be different and I'll do it again.

Speaker 3:

I'll try harder.

Speaker 1:

I'll want it worse.

Speaker 3:

Right, yeah, that's exactly what it is.

Speaker 3:

It's like these are most of the time. These are businesses. Weight Watchers is a gimmick. It's designed to help you fail. That's to help you fail. That's why they.

Speaker 3:

You think they want you to see results and never come back and use their, use their program again? Absolutely not these juice cleanses. You think they want you to lose weight and keep it off? Absolutely not. They want you to come back and drink more, buy more, keep on shitting, keep on shitting. Yeah, they want you to come back. Uh, they want you to buy their books, buy their supplements. You know, do all these things. Even apps. Even my fitness pal wants you to come back. They want you to buy their books, buy their supplements, do all these things. Even apps. Even MyFitnessPal wants you to be reliant on their program. That's what it is. You'll lose some weight and then you gain it back because they give you extremely low recommendations for calories. Then you pay for another month premium and you just try harder next time.

Speaker 3:

Like these things are designed for you to fail. You have not failed them Yours because of lack of willpower or because you didn't want it bad enough. The people who I work with want it so fucking bad. They don't want anything more than they want to lose weight. It's not a matter of want. It's not a matter of effort. Most of the time it is a matter of the things I've tried haven't taught me how to do things. They haven't taught me how to eat. They've taught me how to diet.

Speaker 1:

Right. So how like? And then that leads into how do you set realistic expectations and how low can you set the bar? Because you know me, I like to walk over the bar, I like to keep that shit like real, like I woke up today, check. Thank you very much.

Speaker 2:

That's something I've done now everybody round of applause for liam. Come on, I got out of bed eventually not immediately, but eventually.

Speaker 1:

And you know what can I just say? Like what I find quite interesting? I get quite a few comments from people saying, like it's so nice to watch, like someone like an influencer or whatever, whose house is a mess, who doesn't do things perfectly, the recipes he makes are all fucked up, like it's burnt. There's shit everywhere Like this is the. I'm like that's how most almost everyone is. Like I'm sure there's like that guy who's trying to reverse age himself or whatever. Like that's cool. There's those people in the world. But for like ninety nine, point nine nine percent of us, we were just fucking up and we're fumbling through life, but we fumble forward, so like just it's very small goals.

Speaker 1:

The small goals are are fine. Just, you know, I exercised, I did some form of movement I almost thought you were gonna say you wet the bed I wet the bed. What was I so? I don't even is that what you were.

Speaker 2:

I think you were about to say I went, I went to the gym.

Speaker 1:

Oh well, yeah, I mean you're jumping the gun real hard there.

Speaker 3:

I haven't wet the bed in two weeks I don't know what you're talking about and that's why I got out of bed, because I wet it.

Speaker 1:

That's why actually, the smell is just too much. Oh my god, I should not have eaten asparagus it was warm, but then it cooled off. God like a beer grill style you just pee on like a rag wrap it around your head and you're like I'm cool now I'm like there listen I commit to bits. But you man like fucking um pee hats off to you like you really you really do it.

Speaker 1:

I can't, you know. He gave himself where I feel like we're, I don't know, we're like banned from, like you know, podcasting now, but like he, he was like you can't drink ocean water, but what you can do, give yourself an enema and he, like put it up his butt and I was like that's not like listen, I'm not an expert on this, but like there's, that's not a thing you can't just like well, I can't drink it, but I can put it up my butt. That's not how. There's no way I haven't watched.

Speaker 1:

No way, we don't need back on the show in order for me to say, like that's bacteria, that's bad, oh god, don't do that. Anyway, where were we headed before we get realistic?

Speaker 3:

expectations, ah, yes, well, okay, I will say this. I think that it really just depends on the person, because you joked, but, like, to be honest, for a lot of people, getting out of bed, yeah, is a big step. I've, I'm sure we have probably all felt that way at some point, and so it may be. It may be dependent on the person. It may be dependent on the person at that point in their life, you know, you may need to like, don't expect yourself to do things that maybe were easy before. When you have different obligations, different responsibilities, um, you know, you may be at a different point in your life where you need to adjust your expectations and go listen, I can't do that anymore, or I, this does not come as easy anymore. I need to. I need to like start smaller. You know, maybe I can't prep all week, but I could maybe, you know, put some, uh, some ingredients together, you know just focusing on better.

Speaker 1:

Like I did a video recently. There was a guy I was like hey, go for a walk for 20 minutes if you can, and whatever steps you did, try and do more than that in the future. Basically, it's just like, try and just focus on a little bit better. We get so focused on like numbers, like I got to get this many this, this many, that, like that's how do I like? Ok, especially if we're making videos that are like talking to thousands of people. Right, like how do I say something like this Do this to like one hundred thousand people like you all, unless it's something simple like eat vegetables, like there's, it's hard to get specific, so you just have to focus on what's more than you're currently doing and can you achieve that?

Speaker 3:

yeah, I mean it really is it really? Is it really is about getting just a little bit better each day.

Speaker 2:

yeah, you mentioned like getting more steps. There's other ways of of doing more, I guess. Right, personally, from Personally, from personal anecdote, you know, for the last while I've been pretty depressed and one of the goals was to go out walking. But part of my diagnosis is severe social anxiety disorder, which sometimes makes it hard to go out during the day. And what I started doing was actually going out pretty late at night, you know, a little bit past midnight, pretty much no one's around. Just walked the cat around the block once and eventually, you know, it started getting a little bit earlier and a little bit longer. And then, you know, I'm back to the point now where I'm walking again. I still like to do it during the evening, but it's, you know, people are still out.

Speaker 3:

And that's, and that is and.

Speaker 1:

I think that leads back into the thing we were talking. We talked about last week, and we've talked about a bunch of kind of like um, focus on what you can add, don't restrict. Eat what you want, add what you need. You know, all these different phrases is just about adding more things, just like when it comes to your diet, okay, how can I add more nutritious foods? How can I add, you know, a little bit more movement in terms of walking? Just like. How can you add a little? How can I sleep a little bit more? Jesus Christ, every time I do a goddamn video about sleep.

Speaker 1:

People are like Christ. Every time I do a goddamn video about sleep, people are like I was with you till that one. I won't sleep ever. I stop it.

Speaker 2:

I hate that Stop saying that I never thought those comments Me too.

Speaker 3:

I'll tell you the hardest part, the hardest part about working with adult clients is convincing them to sleep, and I don't know why.

Speaker 1:

What the fuck is up with you. I'm sorry, I don't mean to yell at all of you, but like you drive me crazy with this, like I won't sleep, I'll do the rest of the things. What do you mean? The physiological thing that is like your body needs or you'll die. Like you need a certain like, please try and get at least, you know, seven hours, preferably like eight hours, and listen, I you know kind of one year old daughter and like we got shit going on and I totally get it. Working night sucks ass. I know that, trust me. But like, just do what you, try and get a little bit more sleep. Put the phone down a few minutes earlier, listen to something, relax, get some damn sleep.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, if there is sleep when I'm dead.

Speaker 1:

So much and I also am mad at you because you won't sleep.

Speaker 3:

If there is one thing that you should try and change in your life, it's not eating better, it's not exercising more, it is freaking sleeping more. All of those other things won't prove. If you would just sleep seven hours, eight hours, why do I have to tell you to go to bed? What is so important? At midnight you have to watch another episode eat better, I'll exercise.

Speaker 1:

But you tell them sleep, they're like oh no, I can't do that I'm like I want to.

Speaker 2:

Okay, guys, guys, we're gonna set this up, we're gonna, we're gonna record reading. Go to fuck, to sleep round robin style. Everybody can just put that on their playlist every night.

Speaker 1:

Go the fuck to sleep well that actually help people go to sleep. Go the fuck to sleep.

Speaker 3:

That's going to be our next collaboration TikTok.

Speaker 1:

My daughter has some like night, some like books, some like bedtime books. We'll just read that. Can we put that out as an episode? Can we just put like reading like Winnie the Pooh I guess one of our episodes. People can just go back to that and be like I'm going to put this on.

Speaker 2:

This is brilliant, let us know. Go to the Patreon and let us know. Do you want to hear that?

Speaker 1:

What do you want? What is it going to take for you? You jerks, you jerks to sleep. Oh, gosh.

Speaker 3:

Well, one day, one day, they'll you know, hopefully it'll go through their, their heads.

Speaker 1:

I don't think it will. I think I'll continue to hear from them like, well, I didn't sleep ever. I'll just try and eat more fiber. I'll take a psyllium husk powder fuck it all stop if I take enough supplements, I don't need sleep I yeah, that's, that's totally five supplements per hour of sleep. That's what you, that's what people want me to tell them it's like you need to use five supplements per one hour less you get of sleep I could sleep or I could have another coca-cola.

Speaker 1:

Yeah right another monster, oh, the white monster, though, those white sugar-free monsters those are the only acceptable maybe you just need a c1 adjustment and that'll okay, so realistic expectations. Don't beat yourself up, but do be. You know a little, but do be realistic, stern when needed and focus on just better, like that's it's life yeah, not perfect, not perfect, just better not perfect better I think we've cracked the code to pause as the world crumbles while we figure out the answer to being healthier.

Speaker 3:

We have finally called nasa. We finally discovered it. Oh gosh, I'll tell you that all those things might not help you lose weight, but they will make you happy. They will absolutely do that right.

Speaker 1:

Like I want to be like 60 something and my daughter's like 30 and I can still keep up and do all the things that like she's doing and whatnot. Like I don't, I want to be able to. I want to be able to, like, get up off the ground when I'm 75. Like I want to be. I want to, you know, be able to live alone when I'm 80. Like those, those are like my goals.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, I mean, the thing is like you're going, you're always, you're going to remember how you're. You're going to remember how you felt throughout your life. You remember the events, the memories you make, all these things. You're not going to remember, hopefully, your weight when you were 32, you're not going to remember you know what your pant size was. Uh, on your 80th birthday. Oh, I remember 50 years ago I was 180. Who cares? You only live once. Stop spending that life being goddamn miserable. There are more important things.

Speaker 1:

That's what I think you need to yell at people and put as their ringtone and they wake up. Stop being fucking miserable, get out of bed. Focus on better.

Speaker 3:

Get out of bed. Yes, adam, get out of bed and enjoy your damn day, that's it.

Speaker 2:

I said good day, good day so, adam, how are you doing on time?

Speaker 3:

I know you were.

Speaker 2:

I know I do got to wrap up pretty soon do you have enough time for some rapid fire questions from your fans? I have fans you have. You have a question, all right first question sure, be sure, I've got okay. You don't like, let's go through this fast. You don't have to give super intense. You know detailed stuff, but favorite way to cool down and relax after an intense workout.

Speaker 3:

Um, man, favorite way to cool down after a workout. I you know what? Uh, a nice, a nice walk on the treadmill, probably right after the workout. That's that's what I do, to just cool down for a few minutes.

Speaker 2:

There you go. How do you prep for vacations when you know your routine will be disrupted? Well, say that again. Say it again. Sorry, I got disconnected for a second there.

Speaker 3:

How do you prep for vacations when you know your routine will be disrupted? That's a great question. How do you prep for vacations when you know your routine is going to be interrupted? Um, give yourself a lot of grace. I just took a two week vacation. I didn't work out one single time. Uh, don't like, don't, don't obsess about it. I think the stress of oh God, how am I going to stay on my, my, my routine is probably harder than than just like taking two weeks off. It's not a huge deal.

Speaker 2:

Have you ever struggled with gym anxiety and if so, how do you push through it?

Speaker 3:

Maybe when I first started. Um, I think the secret is learning to not give a single fuck, and that's not an easy thing to do. That's the secret in life in general. I feel like.

Speaker 1:

I go for a lot of things.

Speaker 3:

In all seriousness, realize that the gym is for you and you're there for you. You're not there for anybody else.

Speaker 2:

What are your thoughts on prepackaged meal services?

Speaker 3:

If they work, if you like the taste and it fits in your budget, I think it can be a good. A good uh, cause they're expensive as shit.

Speaker 2:

Yes, convenient, but expensive, holy shit.

Speaker 1:

They're like oh, and that'll be $130 for the month. Oh, no, that's for a week.

Speaker 3:

That's for two meals. Yeah, yeah, uh, but but if you like it and it works for you, do it, otherwise you know.

Speaker 2:

What are the best non-meat protein options? Oh, that's a great question. There's Liam holding up edamame, Actually.

Speaker 3:

I really love the Obeen brand. They make soybean pasta. That's outstanding.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, soybean pasta, that's good and it's got a lot of fiber too.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, soybean pasta that's good and it's got a lot of fiber too. Yeah, it's delicious and it's pretty affordable. I have so many like vegan meat products now. You can find replacements for just about anything. You can find fish, you can find deli meat, you can find salami. You can find pepperoni, like anything. There's a soy option for it. It's not always super cheap, but pepperoni, like anything, there's a soy option for it. It's not always super cheap, but, um, yeah, I mean just experiment, uh, otherwise beans, uh, tofu, good staples.

Speaker 1:

It's to say non-meat because then, like greek yogurt's, like one of my favorites, ah yeah, not a vegan one, I don't remember. It did say non-meat yeah, non-meat.

Speaker 2:

Okay, there you go, that's a. Okay, there you go, that's a great. Yeah, that's a great option.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, Greek yogurt for sure.

Speaker 2:

How do you set healthy boundaries when meeting people, for example at cons, when people want to touch you in your cosplay, for example, when you're not comfortable with that?

Speaker 3:

That is a great question. That's not something that I struggle with. Personally, I love when people ask for hugs and all that stuff you love pushing people up against the wall.

Speaker 2:

Don't talk about that.

Speaker 1:

Consensual only.

Speaker 3:

Consensual only? Yeah, that's a great question. You know, keep your distance. I would say, you know, don't be afraid to like put your hand out and just say, you know, like kindness is important, I think, but, but, but don't be, don't feel like you need to. Thank you. Kind but yeah, send your hand out for a handshake instead of a hug. You know, like those things are OK. It is OK to to not. Yeah, it's OK to have your personal bubble, that's okay.

Speaker 2:

All right. Last question, and obviously the most important how do you look so good in pearls?

Speaker 3:

Okay, I like that question. You know, I bought these because I saw Harry Styles wore them and I was like those are cool. Where did he get them? And I Googled it and and I, and then I found this brand and I really love it. I don't even remember what it is anymore, but um.

Speaker 1:

Are they like meal prep delivery service, expensive or like?

Speaker 3:

I think this is honestly. This is like $200. Like it's not, not, not did not break the bank, um, but I just never take it off. Uh, it's lasted for like probably a year, I think. Now people just know me for it, so it's so weird. But you know, hey, what can I say I? I I pull off the pearls. It goes well with the nail polish well, there you go.

Speaker 2:

Well, thank you to the people who submitted some questions for you.

Speaker 3:

That was so nice. Yeah, I'm a little.

Speaker 2:

You're all seven of your fans on there.

Speaker 1:

Oh crunchy or creamy wasn't on there. Crunchy or creamy, that's the real and only question that matters.

Speaker 3:

Crunchy, it's always crunchy. Crunchy, it's super crunchy. We got crunchy and all you creamy people with your less texture and weirdos. No, no, no. Well, thank you guys for having me. I know you need to wrap things up.

Speaker 2:

I do. Yeah, let's see if we can get this episode to like. Let's break all the records Break them when this episode comes All the records. Yeah, let's do it.

Speaker 3:

I have strong expectations now. I have a reputation to uphold.

Speaker 1:

And then when they crumble, then I'm going to feel shitty and do nothing for a week. Let's go, you just need to do this right now.

Speaker 2:

Go share it with your uncle, with your aunt, with your baby brother.

Speaker 1:

I don't care. He talks about your thighs and everything.

Speaker 3:

Exactly, expose them.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, let Adam talk to them, put a little note on your dog and let him run around the neighborhood with it.

Speaker 3:

In moderation and set Liam's voice as your wake-up ringtone. Man, I'm going to. There we go.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, we just need like a 30-second episode where I just yell at people. I will fucking absolutely record that.

Speaker 3:

Just tell them to save it, save it and play it whenever you need it. Well, thank you guys so much for having me. It was a wonderful time, as always. I look forward to being on the 100th episode 100.

Speaker 2:

Well, you need to hold the record if you want to be on the 100th.

Speaker 3:

So okay, pressure's on.

Speaker 2:

All right, yep, thank you guys all right, and for the rest of you guys, for the giveaway, as I mentioned last episode, I'm going to be saving all the names in the Patreon and I'll be drawing those when I finally get. I hear back from all the sponsors and stuff, so that'll happen at some point, and don't be your worst. And don't be your worst.

People on this episode